I was gifted by Nicole Mattthieson, my Ayurveda teacher, a beautiful book called “Inward” by Yung Pueblo. I just received it and opened it to a random page and read this:
I was never addicted
to one thing;
I was addicted to filling
a void
with things other
than my own love
Coincidentally, it’s been two years since I broke up with my best friend, alcohol, and gave up drinking. It’s no coincidence that I opened to this page!
We all have something in our lives. Something that we hold onto longer than we should. Something that brings us temporary comfort. But deep down ,we know it’s not good for us. We ignore the little voice in our head or the feeling in our heart that lets us know that we deserve more than this.
For me, this voice started years before. What started as an effort to let go and have fun, evolved into years of self-medicating after a painful breakup.
I always knew “later in life” I would let it go and live in sobriety. Later in life seemed just the right amount of time in the future. Until the day came that I could no longer prolong the inevitable.
You see, I had three invitations. Did you know that the Universe gives you only three warnings when it’s time to make a life change?
First, it’s a whisper, a little voice that you hear or feel or know.
Next, it’s a tap on the shoulder.
Finally, it’s an air conditioning unit that falls from a third story window onto your head. You survive, but now you are forced to make a life change, whatever it is.
For me, I started out with the big one. I prayed to God for help one night, and three weeks later, I had a stroke that left me paralyzed on the left side! That literally sobered me up!
Not to be dissuaded, I got sober for almost three months, then started drinking again. I never went back to the daily habit before the stroke, but alcohol continued as a welcome guest in my life. But, I knew the days were numbered.
Finally, many years later, I was given two more invitations. More subtle, but loud enough to get my attention.
When the third came, I thought “if not now, when?”
That was it! If not now, when?
What are you waiting for?
Much love,
Michelle
